Live Like You Mean It

Live like you mean it.  It's a familiar phrase.  Most of us, at some point, have heard it.  But what does it mean?  Live like you mean it.  Like I mean what?

For me, to live like I mean it, means to live like I mean to be a Christ follower.  I claim everyday that Christ is my Lord, and I follow Him.  But do I mean that?  Do I really mean the words that I say?  I think that is what this phrase means.  For a Christian anyways.

Live like you mean...
Love
Forgiveness
Grace
Worship
Sacrifice
Servanthood
... and the list goes on.

In Luke 6:46-49 Jesus calls us out on this.  He is pretty clear that His words are not merely for us to use in Bible study, etc.  His words are for us to use.  His words, His commands, His teachings, are for us to live out, to build a foundation for our lives.  We are to live these words out, to live them like we mean it.

This is something that has really been hitting me hard lately.  I can go to church all I want.  I can say that I'm a Christian all I want.  I can witness to people all I want.  But if I'm not living out what God's Word says and commands, I'm not truly being a Christian.  Jesus tells us in Luke 9:23-27 that we are to follow him DAILY.  In order to do this, I have to set aside my own selfish ambitions and seek God's face on what His ambitions for my life are.  Everyday.

Let me be clear.  I'm not saying I wouldn't go to heaven if I don't follow Christ daily - I can't make that call, only God can.  There are multiple scriptures that say if we confess with our mouths that Jesus is Lord and believe in our hearts that God raised Him from the dead, then we are saved.  HOWEVER, there are many, many scriptures backing up the fact that Jesus says we have to FOLLOW HIM. That there should be good fruit in our lives if we are Christ followers.  I believe that having good fruit is a result of dying to ourselves and following Christ.

So, my desire is that on the day I meet my maker, I will call out to Him and He will recognize me as one of His children, and welcome me in.  My desire is to live like I mean what I believe.  To live like I mean what I say.  Simply, to live like I mean it.

Longing for Home

As I have grown in my relationship with God (or so it feels like I've grown), worship looks different that it used to.  Worship used to mean singing along to the songs at church.  I'm not sure if I really listened to the words, or if I was just singing because I love to sing.  Lately, within the last year or so, worship has changed.  I don't save it for church.  In fact, one of my favorite ways to worship is not even at church (although corporate worship is important and should be done).

I have grown to love this process.

-First I grab my journal, or just a notebook, and a writing utensil.
-Then, I turn on worship music. I enjoy Spotify because I have made a playlist that plays only worship songs that I have chosen.  This helps me hear the songs that are most worshipful to me.
-Lastly, I let the songs play, and really try to listen to the words.  As I'm listening, I begin writing down lines in the song that mean something to me.  In the end, it may not make sense to read straight through, but I was allowing my heart to stew on those phrases and what the song is really saying.

This process has begun to find it's way into my day more and more often.  However, sometimes I don't write anything down.  Instead I close my eyes and really try to focus on God, in trinity form, simmering the words.  I pour my heart out to God, which sometimes always results in tears.  I simply cannot truly worship without crying.  In fact, sometimes it's annoying..... but I know God doesn't care if I cry - He only cares about my heart.

Hopefully, you are allowing your heart the privilege of true worship.  I find it difficult to be a Christ follower if I'm not surrendering my life to Christ in worship.  By truly worshipping, you are submitting.  You are handing over the reigns to the One in charge.  I think once we get that down, it will be easier for us to live it out on a daily basis.

Thanks to these moments of true worship, my heart feels like it might explode sometimes with love for God.  There is no feeling like it that anything on this earth can produce.  My heart and my soul long to be in Heaven in the presence of the Holy Trinity.  Just thinking about it makes me wish I could just teleport there.  Too bad teleportation is only in the movies.... ;)
Sometimes my heart aches so badly to be with my Lord that it makes me sad.  It makes me sad because I realize after a few minutes that I've forgotten that I would be leaving behind a husband and a sweet little boy, my son.  I am sad, but I am happy at the same time.  I'm sad for my family, if I were to be at home with the Lord anytime soon, or even later in life, but my heart sings at the thought of being with the LORD!  It's such a conflicting feeling.  I know God gave me this family to experience tangible love, and to live out my commitment to Him -  but in the end, I still can't help looking forward to eternity with Him!

This quote, which I didn't find until just now, says my thoughts:

"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. If none of my earthly pleasures satisfy it, that does not prove that the universe is a fraud. Probably earthly pleasures were never really meant to satisfy, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing... I must keep alive in myself the desire for my true country, which I shall not find till after death... I must make it the main object of life to press on to that other country and to help others to do the same." (C. S. Lewis

One Year

So I'm a day late in posting this, but I was just a tad busy celebrating the year's worth of life our son has had! It's crazy to think that just yesterday one year ago we were holding our firstborn in our arms. We were still in shock at that point - some days even now, it still seems unreal. To think that we could be responsible for another life. It's scary yet exciting all at the same time.

One year ago, our son had the most basics needs. His only worries in life were that his tummy was full, and that he was warm and safe. Those needs were very easily met, even though we were new parents and didn't have a clue what we were doing.

Now, our little boy seems so grown up. He has four teeth, with one attempting to emerge. He has had 3 or 4 haircuts. He has been saying, "ma ma" for some 7 months now, "da da" was not far behind it. He carries on conversations with anyone who is listening, even the dogs. He is so curious about the world around him. He loves to play with toys, and it's his mission in life to explore every square inch of our house and every place that he goes. In fact, I would say his need for exploration overrides his need for food these days.

Our 8 pound 5 ounces, 21 and a half inches, baby boy is no longer a baby.

And we wouldn't have it anything other way.

To speak or not to speak - that is the question.

I have not always been the best example or tangible witness for my faith.  I am guilty of saying things, doing things, or NOT doing things I should.  It took my very best friend in the world, the person God chose for me to spend my life with, to talk to me and to hold a mirror up to my life and my heart.  I was offended at first, and finally ashamed at the person I had become.  I was heartbroken that the life I said I lived was NOT the life I was actually living.  I was a lie.

Because of my husband's (boyfriend, at the time) guts to tell me to my face, I was able to look inward, into my heart, and see the filth.  I was able to take the blinders off and see the horrible witness I was for the faith I said I believed.  If it weren't for him doing what he (as a Christian) was commanded to do, and to hold me accountable, I would be much worse off, and worse than that, I would be turning people away from Christ, rather than drawing them to Him.

So why did it take so long for someone to speak up? (Someone besides my parents, that is. When you are young, you don't listen to your parents, although you should - they are wise!)  Why had I been living in contradiction to my words for as long as I did before a brother in Christ pulled my feet to the fire?!

I have a theory.  I believe we are afraid.  Why?  Because people do not like to be called out!  People do not like to be told they are doing things they shouldn't.  And a lot of times, if we attempt to shine light on their situation, we risk losing a friend or even family member.  We have a fear of rejection. I understand that.  HOWEVER, if you are a person that claims a way of life, you should not be offended when someone else holds you to that.  Granted we are instructed to do this is specific ways, but we are still instructed to do it.

The question is, when I see someone living in contradiction to their faith, and it happens to be my faith, a faith in which we are to hold each other accountable in a loving, graceful way, do I risk losing a loved one, while being obedient in my faith as well? Or do I sit back, keep the loved one, and us BOTH be living a lie?!

This is not easy.